{"id":2723,"date":"2015-08-18T11:11:17","date_gmt":"2015-08-18T10:11:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/?p=2723"},"modified":"2015-08-18T11:12:40","modified_gmt":"2015-08-18T10:12:40","slug":"everything-i-know-about-james-bond-movies-as-of-august-2015","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/2015\/08\/everything-i-know-about-james-bond-movies-as-of-august-2015\/","title":{"rendered":"Everything I Know About James Bond movies as of August 2015"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Prior to meeting my better half, I had never seen a James Bond movie. I considered this an achievement of sorts. Lilly, however, has a fondness for them, so over the past eight years or so, I&#8217;ve seen what I assume is all of them, and most of them at least twice!<\/p>\n<p>The problem with this is a bit like being introduced to twins, or how I used to have back-to-back German and Spanish classes in high school &#8211; everything just goes into the same file in the brain-cabinet. In that spirit, here is me tipping out the contents of the James Bond file as it currently appears in my mind.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/saveloy-connery.png\" alt=\"saveloy-connery\" width=\"200\" height=\"710\" style=\"float: right; margin-left: 10px;\" \/><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>There\u2019s an early one with Odd Job, who has a deadly bowler hat. They are fighting over some gold<\/li>\n<li>Wheelchair villain scooped up by a helicopter \u2018I\u2019ll buy you a delicatessen in stainless steel!&#8217;<\/li>\n<li>There is one where the villain is a man with three nipples who has a sociopathic dwarf assistant. They live on Thunderbird Island<\/li>\n<li>There is one with Willard Whyte. Baja?!<\/li>\n<li>There is one where the villain is on a boat called M.Y. Disco Volante. Does he have an eyepatch? He says \u2018jettison cocoon\u2019 and James Bond is dressed up like a saveloy sausage<\/li>\n<li>There are two with Jaws, one where he falls out of a closet in a train and one where he falls in love with a tiny blonde girl with glasses in space<\/li>\n<li>There is one exceptionally racist one set in the bayous of Louisiana? Or are they all exceptionally racist?<\/li>\n<li>Roger Moore\u2019s tiny plane that appears out of a horse\u2019s backside? Lesbian pilot school?<\/li>\n<li>There is one starring Christopher Walken and Grace Jones, Walken has a blimp and Jones rides a bomb Dr Strangelove style<\/li>\n<li>James Bond rides a cello down a ski slope?<\/li>\n<li>There is a Pierce Brosnan one where he drives a car around a car park from his giant Nokia communicator, and one featuring jungle thug Goldie. I\u2019ve no idea if they\u2019re the same movie<\/li>\n<li>There\u2019s another Brosnan movie where he makes his car invisible at some big ice palace<\/li>\n<li>In one of the modern Daniel Craig ones he uses a pocked defibrillator on himself. It may or may not be the same movie where there\u2019s some nasty rape scene in that hotel in the middle of the desert that I thought was totally inappropriate for a 12A-rated movie<\/li>\n<li>In Skyfall they blow up the big house in Scotland and Judi Dench dies<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&#8230;That&#8217;s about the extent of it. If nothing else, I think I got the chronology vaguely right?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Prior to meeting my better half, I had never seen a James Bond movie. I considered this an achievement of sorts. Lilly, however, has a fondness for them, so over the past eight years or so, I&#8217;ve seen what I assume is all of them, and most of them at least twice! The problem with [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2731,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[404],"class_list":["post-2723","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-rubbish","tag-james-bond"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/sqsav.png","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pC5Eo-HV","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2723"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2723"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2723\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2729,"href":"https:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2723\/revisions\/2729"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2731"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2723"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2723"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.trickartt.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2723"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}